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June 27, 2010

That Constant Nausea is Normal, Right?*

So for the last few days, every time that I’ve sat down for a minute, I’ve felt like puking. When I’m moving around, when I’m packing and sweating and trying to figure out how to shove something in a box, I feel fine, normal almost.

The second I stop— it’s back. That feeling of HOLY CRAP DID WE REALLY BUY A HOUSE, I HAVE TO WRITE A CHECK FOR HOW MUCH, and IKEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! The longer I sit, the more it builds, and then my head starts swimming and my heart starts pounding, and BOOM. I want to upchuck the food I just ate with paper plates, plastic utensils and paper napkins. (We use cloth napkins, normally. Using paper makes me feel like it’s 1989).

I know it’s something that people do every single day. I know in the scheme of things, this is a pretty tiny milestone, and some people do this more than once or twice in their lives. On the other hand, I refuse to diminish a huge accomplishment that Neale and I have worked so hard for. At some point this winter we didn’t know if this would be possible, and that trapped-in-this-725-sqft-box feeling is far worse than the excited-pukey-anxious feeling.

So, 2 more days. We are wrapping up the packing this weekend. We rented a cargo van for Tuesday, to save some money with the movers on Wednesday. We plan to sleep in our house Tuesday night on a mattress on the floor. I’ve taken 3 days off from work and have a trip to Ikea planned on Saturday. Everything is in it’s right place.

Here we go.

*No, I am not pregnant.

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I hope you say nice things, but if you don't, I'll get over it eventually.